Elephant’s Leg


AMAZING THAILAND – THE SLOGAN AND THE REALITY
Nick and I on an "amazing" Koh Chang elephant

Nick and I on an “amazing” Koh Chang elephant

“Amazing Thailand” is the long-running official slogan of the international tourism drive, as well as the ironic quote of choice for the cynical expat when hearing of some latest outrage.

The latest poltical protest? “Amazing Thailand”. Video footage of a bungling and/or corrupt cop? “Amazing Thailand”. Idiotic driving? “Amazing Thailand”. And so on.

Expats are often pretty miserable types. Naturally, when you live somewhere, you see a lot more of the contry’s foibles and annoyances than the average two-week tourist. But that doesn’t mean the tourist experience is invalid or inaccurate. To the temporary visitor, many things about this country really are amazing. Those of us who live here shouldn’t forget that.

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ANOTHER YEAR IN PARADISE

Sorry to use a cliché, but the past 12 months have continued to be spent in tropical Thailand, and while Bangkok lacks the beaches and tranquility that most would associate with an earthly Eden, it has, for the most part, been a year that was good to me.

What a shame that the country’s political scene is once again threatening to spoil 2014 almost as soon as it starts, but for now my focus is on what did happen, rather than what might, as I sum up 2013.

FAMILY

Grandma taking a break from one of our treks

Grandma taking a break from one of our treks

Thankfully, all my loved ones remained fit and well last year, including my three 80-something grandparents. Most importantly, my Scottish Grandma, who has always been full of vigour, has remained so since the death of Grandpa in 2012. If anything, she has thrived, having now been freed from the duties of caring for him virtually full time in the decade or so before he passed away. She has travelled, met her great-grandchildren and been busier than ever in her community. On top of this, when I visited her in June, we enjoyed some brisk walks amid the glorious Highland scenery and she set a pace that would put many people half her age to shame. Long may this continue!

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WATCH WITH MOTHER, BANGKOK STYLE: SIRIRAJ’S CARNIVAL OF THE GROTESQUE

Together forever – even in death

Where should one take a visiting mother in Bangkok? Temple-hopping, perhaps? Bargain-hunting in markets and malls? Rooftop or riverside dining? Or maybe to see mutated babies, preserved serial killers, elephantiasis-afflicted scrotums the size of medicine balls, and all manner of diseased, ruptured, punctured, crushed and deformed organs, skulls and limbs?

If that, rather than a Chao Phraya cruise, is what floats your – or your mother’s – boat, then jump on board a ferry to Siriraj Hospital’s Forensic Museum, which mixes genuine scientific endeavour with the kind of shock appeal previously reserved for Victorian carnival freakshows or 1980s body-horror movies.

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A WEEK IN MALAYSIA PART 1: PENANG
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Batu Ferringhi

I spent last week in Malaysia with my girlfriend, Waew. It was our first proper holiday together and my first proper trip to Malaysia (I did a brief border hop from Brunei in 2005 but that was essentially just to tick another country off the list). It was also my first proper holiday in South East Asia since moving to Thailand last year, having so far failed to live up to my promise to myself to see as much of the region as possible while living here.

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